After 3 weeks Friday was the day to tell Stavanger good bye and head to Oslo. We could fly there for $100 each, but had the rental car for one more day and with someone else buying the gas we decided the cheapest way to go was to drive. Knew the drive would be 320 miles around the southern coastline of Norway, but the route was on one of Norway's best highways and it went all the way to Oslo. So, no problem, right? There was an Avis office 2 blocks from our hotel in Central Oslo (Sentrum area) so it would be quick jaunt to hotel after dropping off the car.
Avis office there closes at 5 pm and we didn’t leave Stavanger until 10:00 am, but, hey, 7 hours to cover 320 miles should be no problem. Uh…Problem. We were not on I-35 (who would have ever thought I wished for I-35!). The highway was, as the Norwegians call it, a one-lane highway , a two-lane road to you and me. While the scenery was very beautiful driving along the Norway coast, there were almost constant windings and turns and hills. With traffic, we ended up taking over 8 hours and averaging 40 miles per hour! Thus, we go rolling into Oslo 8 after 6 pm.
But, no problem since typically after car rental offices are closed, you can drop your keys off and they’ll email you your bill. Uh…Problem. And it didn’t have anything to do with Avis. Unless you bicker about the location of their Central office. We were following our GPS as we came into Oslo and knew where we needed to exit. Unfortunately the exit name wasn’t the same as we thought and by the time I realized we were missing our exit as we go by, we enter an underground tunnel. (Footnote: Without exaggeration we may have gone through as many as 100 tunnels of varying lengths on our drive that day.) This tunnel was the longest (to that point) as it was almost 4 miles long. So we exit as soon as we can and start using our I-Pad map to find the Avis location.
Needless to say there were lots of stops and starts, wrong turns, even did a “bat turn” in an intersection that was strictly “No Left Turn.” But eventually, we got to the street of the Avis office, and spotted the Avis sign up ahead on the right hand side of the street. Eureka! That Avis sign looked as good as say a billboard saying you had won the Lottery. (Well, maybe not THAT good, but great nonetheless.) No problem, right? Uh…Problem. The right hand lane was for busses and taxis and that lane was filled. So, just make the block and come back armed with this new knowledge. I haven’t driven in Dallas traffic all these years for nothing. Shouldn’t be a problem. Uh…Problem. Major Problem. In making the block, the street was actually going up in elevation. As I got back to where the Avis street was supposed to be we were now on a bridge overlooking the Avis office street! And before I could yell, “Oh shit!” we were going into a tunnel. And this was the granddaddy of all tunnels. It was over 6 miles long!!
Now, we really do have problems. Do we attempt to exit this tunnel and try to get turned around and make another run at the Avis office or do we look for alternatives? I saw a sign for the Oslo airport and I knew the Avis office there closed at 11:00 pm. Even I could make that! But, first we had to determine how far it was to the airport, so my trusty navigator gets on the I-Pad Map and finds out that the airport is 22 miles outside of Oslo (that’s 36 kilometers to you). Gulp! Decision time. Do we turn around and head back to town and trust we find the Avis office AND that we can drop-off the car, or just keep going to the airport?
I decided on a sure thing. Go to the airport. In the meantime my navigator researched transportation from the airport and we settled on taking the train. Eventually we got to the airport and wheel into the Avis parking lot. We’re grabbing our stuff out of the car and as soon as we get the receipt we’ll be on our way. Isn’t that what anyone would think? Uh, no, as it turned out. The kid checking the car found a scratch on the front bumper of the car and needed to check the report for when I got the car 3 weeks ago. I had no such report. So, his boss has to look it up on the computer and that report, OF COURSE, showed nothing wrong with the car when I got it. Imagine that! So, I said I didn’t do anything to the car, so just “do what you have to do and email me and we’ll take care of it.” He goes, “it’s Norwegian Law that you cannot leave until you sign the Damage Report.” Great. How long will that take? Shouldn’t take more than 20 minutes. DOUBLE-CRAP! He couldn’t find an English version of the form, so he told me he’d help me with the Norwegian. Great. We muddled through the report. I signed it and we finally got the hell outta there.
Found the train ticket window in the Terminal. We could catch the “Fast Train” which takes 19 minutes to get to Sentrum and one leaves in 3 minutes and after that it is 13 minutes. I look at my partner who shrugs. Okay we’ll take tickets for the train that leaves in 3 minutes. We take our cart full of luggage and off we go. Flew through the turnstile where an attendant points us to a lift (that’s elevator to you). And finally…luck is with us. We make it to the train on time. Collapse in seats, get off at the 3rd stop which is the National Theater and 2 blocks later we are checking in our hotel. Not around 5 pm as planned, but almost 10:00.
The moral of the story? Probably many, but for me, next time you can fly for $100 – DO IT!! Plus, who knows, different car rental guy may not find a scratch.
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